I haven't been here in a little while. Much of that has to do with the busyness that comes with two kids in school and getting into a new routine...and at the same time, it has nothing to do with that. I haven't wanted to write. Last night, I wrote my monthly piece for Still Standing Magazine. I waited until the very last minute to write it (it's due 2 weeks before it's published online), and last night it needed to be done. This is the first time I've really put this off. This is the first time I've avoided the feelings that come when I put my pain into words. This is the first time I was bitter about writing. I came downstairs after about an hour of typing. I hit "save draft" and sent a message to my editor that it was done but it was bad. I felt so irritated. With myself for procrastinating, with my kids for being loud while I was trying to think...but mostly I was bitter about my topic. I never wanted to write about dead babies. I sat a...